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XOJane

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You Are The Advice Columnist: I Can't Meet Men Who Aren't Sleazy

After a few months of dating, it tends to either fizzle off or become a very casual hookup or "booty call" situation.
So, my question for your expert guidance is based on that befuddling/ fun pastime: DATING. I'm 25 & living in San Francisco, been playing the dating field here for a few years.
The issue that I keep running into is that after a few months of dating, it tends to either fizzle off or become a very casual hookup/ "booty call" situation. I haven't really dated anyone seriously & I think I'd like to explore that monogamous/ "adult-like" territory.
I've met guys through a variety of ways (through friends, hobbies, OKC), but this trend seems to prevail. I'm happy with my life, great group of pals, solid career & generally have my sh-t together while still having a lot of fun. But, it's a bummer when you get to know someone and they eventually seem to reduce you to a sex object, when I feel like that isn't even in the ballpark of the attributes I value most in myself.
What advice would you have to meet fun/cool dudes who don't end up acting like disrespectful sleaze bags? Is this just a casualty of dating, trial and error? Do I just wait a few years until their testosterone levels drop off? Thoughts?

Have any advice for our reader? Let her know in the comments!

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